Slump, 25

Ow, man. Not the needle I was looking for (har har har). And speaking of which...man, already 6:40. Twenty minutes man, I'm out, I'm home, I'm fornication under consent of the motherfucking king-ed, man. Can. Not. Wait. Not that this was all that bad...Those two Jamaicans with the rum, watching those furious Africans screaming at each other in Zulu or whatever and that hot ass Latina who shared a spliff with me...this is the best job ever. And I was right, you get stoned enough and it doesn't matter what you're cleaning up. They piss test me and I'm fucked, but the Rastas said no one gives much of a shit about the night shift unless there's an explosion or something so I think I'm good. That autopsy room and morgue is reeeal creepy shit though. Real Freddy and Jason shit, man. God damn, that stung. Shit. 6:45 baby...mm hm...ow...fucker...shit. Stuff in the red bags is bad, right, but reporting this now? Shit, I only got fifteen minutes left! I got people to see, dragons to chase (har har har) and I'm not going to start filling out fucking paper work NOW. Plus, who would I tell? The Rastas? The Africans? Shit. El barrier del communicationes, hombre... Man, this job is cool. Cathy's awesome. And pretty hot. I'd love if, like, she came over and the Ding was out and I was, like, hey, you want some pot? and she'd be like, yeah...man...no way it's happening man, but, man, that would be the tits....maybe Cathy's tits (har har har). Ten minutes...agh! God damn! Don't you worry, Slump me old scoot, I've got some medicine for you, make you alllll better....then eat something and be back and ready to rock another 11 to 7. Shit, this job is perfect for me. I don't even wake up 'til 11 (har har har). Fuck. This looks swollen. Where's the fucking Bactine...ow...I guess that burning means it's working...fucker...man, Ding said he's meeting a man about some H today...fingers crossed, man, fingers and toes, fingers and toes...fucking red bag...if this shit is so dangerous, why leave it lying around for fucking wastoids like me to fucking pick up? They should like, have trained professionals and shit...ow...red is bad...red means stop...lesson learned, man...damn...three minutes...ah fuck it, I'm leaving...people to see....